Budweiser

Anheuser-Busch

USA

Yep, Budweiser is definitely the King of Beers. Best beer I've ever tasted. Wait, this isn't for Budweiser Budvar? Oh. Anheuser-Busch's Bud? Oh, no, that crap sucks.

Reviewed: February 15, 2004

Rating: 1/10

This beer is the poster child for the mega North American breweries. There are many reasons to hate this beer. I'll try to touch on a few so that every group is represented. My past opinions of Bud have drawn much hate mail questioning my manhood, sexuality, sanity, and patriotism. I hope this review finds you equally as offended. First and foremost, have any of you ever actually tasted this beer? Not drank, mind you, but tasted. Chugging this to get drunk is not tasting, because as any beer connoisseur will tell you, you have to savor the beer by drinking slowly, to absorb the different flavors. If most of you did that, you would pour the rest down the drain. This is awful. I'd compare it to water, but that's not fair to water. Water is drinkable. Second, I have a few friends in England who have vouched that Bud in Britain is higher in alcohol content over there. So, Bud assumes that Americans are not distinguished enough, and they sell us the crap and ship the good stuff overseas. That should offend any good beer-drinking American. Thirdly, they used to (cannot verify if they still) donate money to gun control causes (probably because they don't want their more, how should I say this to avoid offending all of you, redneckish clientele from constantly blowing each other away). Personally, I don't care; just thought some of you might want to know that. Fourthly, their business practices are vile. They have held up Budejovice (the Czech translation of Budweis) Budvar in a legal battle for "territory" for decades. If Bud was that sure of their quality, why not let them market in the US and compete head-to-head? Budweiser is German for "Someone from Budweis." Last I heard, Bud comes from St Louis, not Budweis. That's misadvertising, and they're accusing Budweiser Budvar of copyright infringement? Bud claiming to be a "Budweiser" is like Hillary Clinton passing herself off as a senator from New York (please see my rant on her). Let a respectable, decent tasting beer use that title. So, to summarize, it's crap, and its parent company engages in disgusting business practices, which is why you should not drink this stuff. And if your issue is price, try Miller or Coors. If your argument is that it's the best selling beer in the world, that's only because they've proven that we can be bought with flashy advertising. Don't let Anheuser Busch win your mind, think for yourself.

Reviewed: February 22, 2002

Rating: 1/10

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